The RTO day by day

The Unsinkable RTO

2010-02-17T10:45:00.000-08:00

The new chief executive appointed to head Creative Scotland, formerly the Scottish Arts Council, is not Scottish by birth but has spent a total of 138 days in this country, demonstrating ample enthusiasm for its culture. It is Andrew Dixon’s love of the arts that qualifies him for the exciting task ahead, and it scarcely matters that he has made his professional mark outside of Scotland.
The cultural community tends to seek its visionaries beyond the normal boundaries, thus a New Zealander leads Scottish Opera, a Frenchman drives the Royal Scottish National Orchestra and an Australian is the current brains behind the Edinburgh International Festival.
It is a trend that chimes with the RTO, which has brought international flavours into its Scottish mix with (to mention but a few) an Antipodean chairperson and first trumpet, a Californian flautist, and German, Franco Hungarian and Kiwi violinists.
A passion for the arts is the only criteria relevant to any arts organisation, the RTO included. That is all that was required way back when the orchestra’s guiding light was hired, though Sir Richard of course is blessed with many attributes.
Sir Richard, who is English, did not look for the musical directorship of the RTO. He was not a self-referring applicant. The orchestra had to go out there and find him. As one leading arts commentator said, the kind of person and personality required for this absolutely pivotal role is not likely to list sending for application forms as his or her hobby.
Unlike the boss of Creative Scotland, Sir Richard did not have to go through the Office of the Commissioner for Public Appointments in Scotland (Ocpas), the quango deployed to ensure a candidate’s competence and screen out any nepotism. The RTO recruitment process is slightly more random.
But once identified and wooed, Sir Richard proved more than up to the challenge of meshing the early RTOers into an incredible band. It is to his credit that they have grown even more incredible with the passing of time.
Which brings us, via the scenic route, to the Cramond Association. It is not every conductor of international repute who is invited to speak at the Cramond Association. In fact, Sir Richard may well have been the first. But when he addressed a record crowd last month, packed into the Association’s Millennium Room, everyone present agreed it was A Night to Remember (as was the sinking of the Titanic).
The Association’s President, George Reid, said Sir Richard ‘gave a fascinating and humorous account of the origins and development of the orchestra’. His talk was interspersed with music from orchestra members, but otherwise it was a very enjoyable evening.
What Mr Reid didn’t realise, though, is that minutes before he was due to speak, Sir Richard discovered he had lost his notes. This catastrophe might have flayed a less versatile performer but with his many years’ experience in the RTO, the maestro was quite at ease without notes. And the fact that the self-selected musicians (mostly trumpets) present didn’t bother with notes either made the whole thing look and sound completely unrehearsed!
Following the event at Cramond, other RTO players have been forming small groups and will be making themselves available for appearances at functions throughout Scotland, and abroad if called (and paid) for.
There is even a rumour, so far unconfirmed, that the RTO string trio, last heard at the Christmas 2007 Concert, will be released (on licence) for a one-off date. Please contact the website for further details.

Really Terrible rules

2009-11-08T11:15:00.000-08:00

Moves to make the RTO a co-operative – whereby all members become equally responsible – have not really worked out. Instead of more democracy in the orchestra, it has been agreed that there will be less, and all important decisions from now on will be taken by the Chairman. This is not to say that the ordinary musicians, who are the band’s very life blood, will not be involved in the day to day running of the RTO – far from it! In fact, Pippa, the Chairman, has asked for as many RTOers as possible to volunteer as informal helpers (see below) and would especially like to hear from those who have not helped for a while, or who have never helped in any way at all.
To clarify the new management style of the orchestra, the following rules – let’s call them guidelines - have been made:

1. There will be no written constitution. After consulting constitutional experts within the RTO, Pippa took a unanimous decision to not write anything down, but rather to keep a few ideas in her head about how the RTO should be run.
2. There will be a culture of contribution. This enables anyone from any section to have their input, and even to vote when there are contentious issues – for example, whether or not to retain the RTO Christmas card.
3. The Chairman will have the power to veto any contributions she does not consider appropriate, although this should in no way deter potential contributors from making their contributions.
4. There will be three decision making processes: a ballot of members (with the final result being decided by Pippa); Pippa canvassing opinions informally and then reaching her decision; Pippa just making a decision by herself.
5. Informal helpers. Because the Chairman’s workload has increased, informal helpers will be recruited to do various bits and pieces. These can range from handing out music, arranging chairs and stacking music stands at rehearsals, to organising a major RTO event, such as a concert or an overseas tour.

Although there is not much left to discuss, the focus groups, or informal chats, at Pippa’s will continue because they allow people to feel they are contributing. Members who have not yet attended an informal chat can rest assured that they are on the list and their turn will come! Slightly more formal chats may be held in the New Year.
* Sir Richard’s throwaway remark to percussion last week, that they were not playing ‘wrong notes, just different notes’ should not be taken too literally by other players. While freedom of expression is to be encouraged, it is feared that too much deviation from the music will lead the RTO astray. Written notes, unlike written constitutions, do have their place in the orchestra.
**Great news! The New York DVD is now in the final editing stages and should be ready in time for Christmas 2010. Watch this space for further developments.
***Look out for future blogs, including ‘Has anyone seen Zandra?’, ‘Seconds Out!’, and ‘The Grade Eight Fake’.

Nameless wonders

2009-09-15T06:13:00.000-07:00

The RTO’s autumn season began in earnest last week with a run through of some exciting new repertoire, which had been collected by Dorothy, the new music secretary. Actually, Dorothy is not new at all, having been an RTO regular for many years and the leader of the double basses for even longer. But her elevation to music secretary is a departure and as such was marked by the orchestra with four cheers. Dorothy was appointed to her post by Pippa, the new RTO chairman, and will be assisted from time to time by several depute music secretaries (the successful candidates will be notified by post).
There are also new section leaders, following various promotions and sideways moves at the end of the summer session, and as a consequence there have been a few teething problems, particularly in the handing in of old music. Handing in of old music (HIOOM) always takes place immediately after the Fringe Concert in Canongate Kirk. Even musicians who have other pressing engagements, guests and/or children to attend to, or Usher Hall festival tickets to enjoy must first comply with HIOOM guidance and best practice (any practice would be welcome). This year, all sections except one (which shall remain nameless) cooperated fully, despite the inexperience of many section leaders in putting pages in order and clipping them together.
The nameless section (and, no, it wasn’t the violas) will not be exposed but will be given the chance to redeem itself later in the year, perhaps with one of the coveted solo slots at the Christmas party.
And so on to forthcoming events. First up is the airing on German national television of an eight-hour long RTO documentary. While the orchestra has many overseas fans, it has hardly been a secret that Germany was not one of them. In fact, a German newspaper once took the liberty of questioning the point of the RTO. Therefore, it was an enormous surprise when Lennart Herberhold of NDR TV phoned Pippa requesting permission to film the Fringe concert for his weekly culture show. The RTO operates an open doors policy and treats all press enquiries, however unusual, with equal seriousness. Access was duly accorded to Lennart, who arrived at the church early on the morning of August 30th and filmed everything in sight, including some members of the orchestra trying to put up their music stands and others reserving rows of pews for family and friends with their viola cases. Felicitas gave by far the longest interview and was the only RTOer who agreed to be interrogated in German. The results will be broadcast some time this month, in German, without subtitles, and the DVD box sets will go on sale at the next concert.
*As promised, the RTO will soon launch a special Meet the Mentor page on the website, featuring those professional musicians who have undertaken to coach an RTOer. It had been hoped to have this item up and running by now but the tutors involved have refused to pose for photographs or even confirm that they are indeed official RTO teachers. The response from the orchestra has been the exact opposite, with many players only too happy to share the details of their tuition with the general public. Why, just the other day Zandra Macpherson (violin) confided that she had embarked on a course of lessons, in the wake of her move from Seconds to Firsts. Zandra’s violin teacher would make an interesting study for musicologists, it is felt.

Pip pip

2009-06-09T05:00:00.000-07:00

The silence of the blog over these past few weeks has nothing to do with the incapacity of the blogger; nor can it be blamed on any technical malfunction. The fact is, events so momentous have unfolded that even the most eloquent scribe would have had trouble conveying them to his public. Imagine, then, how your really terrible blogger feels. But someone has to tell you, so here goes.
About two months ago, maybe more, the driving force behind the RTO, its only ever chairman, decided to spend more time with his clarinet. Peter Stevenson had worked tirelessly to put the orchestra on the musical map and after New York in April he felt, with some justification, that he had done all he could. The musicians had reached a peak, of sorts, world fame was within their grasp and a whole legion of RTOs launched. This was thanks largely to the efforts and ambition of Peter.
But the question of ‘where do we go now?’ was for others to answer. So when the triumphant band returned from the States the race was on for a successor, preferably someone with previous experience of running an orchestra, plus tact, patience, supreme musicianship, humility, and outstanding team skills, or failing that, someone just like Peter.
It should be mentioned at this stage that the job was not advertised externally; although the RTO has a very strict policy of inclusiveness and does not discriminate on the grounds of gender, race, age, religion or talent, this only applies to the musicians in the orchestra. When it comes to appointing chairmen, the criteria are somewhat different and the selection process completely undemocratic.
That said, however, no one objected when Pippa Lockhart declared unilaterally that she was to succeed Peter in the top (executive) role. Pippa, first trumpet, music secretary, and a member of the RTO almost since the beginning, probably would have been elected unopposed if there had been a vote (which there wasn’t).
RTO leaders tend to emerge organically and Pippa has been emerging for as long as the brass section, which perhaps more than any other section (bar the violas) always makes an unforgettable impression on audiences.
Under Pippa, the players know exactly where they are – or at least they did until she started moving them around. The one thing Peter never meddled with as chairman was the orchestra. If there were fifteen flutes and no cellos he never said anything like ‘we could do with a couple more cellos and a couple less of some other instruments’.
But Pippa has wasted no time in tackling imbalances, boosting a temporarily depleted back row with a trial trumpet and a French horn, and overcoming a dearth of first violins by promoting three seconds. RTOers, you see, will do anything for their popular new chairman.
Felicitas Macfie has kindly volunteered to take over as leader of the seconds and will be delighted to copy endless piles of music for the section (and any other sections, such is her eagerness to please). In another break with tradition, she will also be holding practice sessions for the strings in her front room, on those days in the week when she is not preoccupied with the supervision of her six children.
Already, the Pippa era is shaping up to be very distinctive from the Peter era in every way, except for the actual playing. In this, RTO fans can rest assured that nothing will change.

The trumpets shall not sound!

2009-05-09T10:03:00.000-07:00

Few orchestras survive a season without a disaster or two and the RTO is no exception (in this and this alone). At rehearsal last Wednesday it was revealed that joint third trumpet Ninian will not be present at the Fingask event in the summer, which means that out of the current four RTO trumpets, four will be absent.
Compounding the catastrophe is the fact that among the cry-offs is Pippa Lockhart, first trumpet and new RTO Chairman (watch this space for further explanation). To say that Pippa is irreplaceable is underestimating the seriousness of the situation. If anyone reading this can a) play the trumpet, b) make themselves available on June 21, and c) bring a friend who plays the trumpet, please contact the RTO via its website as a matter of urgency.
Another issue last week was the violas (when aren’t they?), who outnumbered the first violins by three to one. Only an orchestra of the RTO’s calibre would put up with this and though no one said anything, everyone agreed that the balance was wrong. A motion to move a couple of violas into first violins was unanimously defeated.
Otherwise, the mood, if not the music, was upbeat. Since New York the RTO has been inundated with requests to perform on the international circuit, but while it considers both of these offers (from the Jamaican plantation owner and Zandra’s relatives in NZ), quiet reflection is its chosen course of action.
And what better way to reflect than to run through Fucik’s Entry of the Gladiators, Berlioz’ March to the Scaffold and the Grand March from Aida - all compositions that would challenge the world’s finest bands but were effortlessly executed by the RTO.
Sir Richard, having returned to form, in body and mind, extracted several surprises from the musicians, many of whom seemed emboldened by their American adventure. It has never been RTO etiquette to play in a manner that is noticeable to other RTOers, thus solos - and show-offs - are rarely condoned. But on Wednesday, members of the orchestra heard from Richard D on the horn (in the Berlioz – well done, Richard, it won’t happen again), Gerry on first clarinet (unforgettable), something that sounded like Hugh’s trumpet attacking the Verdi, and Sandy and Winnie in tandem (almost) on bassoon.
It is very encouraging that elements within the orchestra not noted for their exhibitionism are growing in confidence, but it should be stressed that there has been no accompanying growth in ability; the RTO’s reputation is quite safe.
Although the whole New York experience was obviously motivational in the musical sense for some players – Peter, in particular, was keen to share his practice tips – for most it wasn’t in any way improving and the RTO assures its fans that global expansion has done nothing to raise standards.
Rehearsal night did much to expose those standards. When, for example, Sir Richard said ‘play an orchestral C, now play a D, now give me an E, put it all together and what have you got?’ he expected a recognisable ‘Happy Birthday’. But of course there was little recognisable in what followed, and Alison, whose birthday it was (her 31st, making her the youngest by nearly 20 years in the entire orchestra), had to remain standing for several excruciating minutes while the second strings searched for their Es.
On a happier note, a trombone has been found at last to fill the (not terribly big) boots of Quinton Stewart, who retired recently. Step forward the RTO’s very own Pilot King, Blythe Crawford. Blythe is actually a better singer than trombonist and an even better RAF Squadron Leader, but it was agreed (especially by the ladies in wind) that he was eminently suitable. Welcome on board, Blythe!

Saving classical music

2009-04-03T04:03:00.000-07:00

Although expectations were high for the RTO’s New York debut, nothing could have prepared the orchestra for the warmth and ebullience of the reception from a packed Town Hall on April 1. After more standing ovations than accorded Gordon Brown by Congress last month, the musicians were quite overcome and it took all their resolve not to play an encore (that and the fact that their repertoire had been completely exhausted).
A music critic wrote recently that the distinction between art’s essential autonomy and the power of communal solidarity melts away in some orchestras. He was referring to the Simon Bolivar youth orchestra under Gustavo Dudamel, but he could just as easily have been talking about the RTO under Sir Richard.
Was not the core of the experience last Wednesday night, as in the Greece of Aeschylus’s time, the sense of communion it engendered rather than the artwork itself? Was not the distinction between high and low art, popular and classical, middle or working class completely irrelevant?
Perhaps these are questions best pondered in a forum far removed from the RTO website!
For now the Scottish-based musicians are justifiably basking in their phenomenal achievement and pausing to reflect on their next move, which for most will be back home to Edinburgh.
When they touch down they can look forward to a rapturous welcome from a nation grateful for the impact they have made on music and for their quiet cultural diplomacy with the United States, laying the foundations for the presidential trip to Britain.
Of course the non-appearance of either of the Obamas or Hillary Clinton at the Town Hall (all three had travelled to London that week as part of a Homecoming tour which unfortunately did not include Scotland) was a disappointment.
As was the RTO’s failure to make it into this year’s Top Ten Orchestras Which Have Changed the World.
It has been said that all bands are made up of three types of players: the ones who ‘do it’, the passengers, and the wreckers. Well, we all know which type fills the ranks of the RTO! But on April 1 no one who was there can deny that they all ‘did it’.
The idea that the RTO could save classical music is not now so implausible. ‘They raise it up, by reminding us of the old Enlightenment dream – that underneath all our quarrels and differences, we are essentially one human kind, which a single music can speak to. At the same time, they bring it firmly down to earth.’
That was actually written about the Simon Boliver orchestra, not the RTO – hard to believe because somehow it fits so perfectly.
To paraphrase Alexander McCall Smith, the RTO makes everything possible – if musicians of this ability can be successful, just imagine: painters will no longer require a facility with paint and bankers will not be expected to add up.
Bravo RTO!

Broadcast news

2009-03-16T06:49:00.000-07:00

It’s not often that members of the RTO get asked to perform on television, so when the call came last week – from the Andrew Marr politics show no less – there was great excitement in the ranks. With studio space tight, a representative sample of the orchestra was selected, which meant disappointment for some, but there were no hard feelings. This was a great RTO moment of which everyone could be proud.
Lead by contrabassoonist Alexander McCall Smith, a celebrity the world over (bigger even than Marr himself), the tiny troupe made an early start in front of the cameras, fortified by nothing more than BBC coffee. It is rare for musicians of this calibre to face their public in such a pristine state, and even more unusual for their public, who are accustomed to at least a couple of glasses of wine
With a light dusting of Lancome and no further preamble, the Really Terrible Seven took their places for the warm up. It went rather well. The brass were a little rubbery but there was nothing more challenging than a B flat. As for the strings, they coasted it, perhaps on account of there being no violas in the mix.
Everyone then relaxed and enjoyed the show. What could possibly go wrong? Live television might be daunting for some people but not for the amateur pros of the RTO. Time flew, politicians were wheeled on and off, McCall Smith was hauled back to brighten the tone, and the countdown began.
Five minutes, four…. Ian Rankin, another studio guest, sauntered over. ‘You’ve got to be more terrible,’ he said.
‘Never!’ cried RTO Chairman Peter Stevenson who has made it his life’s ambition to progress to Grade Five clarinet. ‘We will do our best.’
Suddenly, the lights were dazzling, the Seven were hurried to their chairs and Sir Richard, lurking behind the cameras, raised his arm.
‘…it’s called a Lazy Waltz,’ said Marr giving the cue. And that’s when it all went a bit off. Martha nearly knocked over her cello, something she’s never attempted before, and the wind and brass blew it basically. The two violins were fine though.
Afterwards, in the recovery room, the producer said it was great, really er great - she’d only had to cut about four and a half of the five RTO minutes.
For those interested, the results will hopefully appear on this website soon. Truly dedicated fans, however, could always check out the really terrible thing and head to New York. But be quick. At the last count, an unbelievable 930 tickets had been sold for the band’s American debut in the Town Hall. Looks like it’s going to be a sell-out folks!

Brief encounter

2009-03-01T14:13:00.000-08:00

It was with great excitement that the RTO welcomed the appointment of a new Culture Minister in Scotland. Mike Russell has moved from patrolling the glens as Wildlife Crime Minister to attending the rarefied salons of the beau monde, and is the tenth politician to hold the much coveted arts brief. This suggests that the culture portfolio is not quite the cushy number it sounds, but Mike is more than up to the task.
On assuming control he made a speech to the nation’s arts lovers, immediately finding favour with his in-depth knowledge of their first names and his joined up approach to words.
And he certainly went down well with members of the RTO when he said: ‘Creativity is not the preserve of the gifted few.’ In fact, he could have gone further. In Scotland today it probably helps the career trajectory of the artiste if he or she is without gifts altogether. A new national awards scheme has generously given several thousands of pounds to a mixed bag of cultural endeavours which appear to positively embrace the giftless.
If only the RTO had known in advance of the ‘Inspire’ programme it could have competed alongside the Shetland Islanders who have been handed £165,000 to combine a light show with the traditional art of lace knitting, or the Highlanders who have received £475,000 to produce a submerged dance spectacular with performers in Wellington boots
This all sits very well with the RTO, obviously, which is by definition terrible, and the Chairman is confident he could have put forward a suitably amusing proposal (RTO violas, say, playing Telemann’s Concerto for Viola) to whet the appetites of the Inspire funding committee had he been forewarned of its creative interpretation of creativity.
On the subject of committees, the return to Edinburgh of Zandra Macpherson, who has been wintering in New Zealand, was celebrated by the New York Organising Select Committee. The meeting scheduled for last week at Pippa’s (who has stood in so admirably for Zandra) will now be held this week at Zandra’s, which gives everyone that bit longer to recover.
On the agenda will be the pros and cons of staging an outside broadcast in Times Square in the event that the Town Hall is sold out. Since 800 tickets (give or take 300, depending on who is counting) have been sold, leaving 700 still to shift, the Times Square scenario is a hypothetical one for now, but we shall keep you posted. Watch this space!

* Following a summit in Washington DC between Scotland’s First Minister Alex Salmond and the US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, the RTO can confirm that the latter will (possibly) be present as one of our VIP guests on April 1st. In what must have been a very busy chat, Mr Salmond nevertheless found a moment to bring up the RTO’s imminent tour and its effect on Stateside music groups. ‘The Secretary of State was clearly impressed by the idea of a small country making a large contribution to a global issue,’ he said.

Really terrific pills

2009-02-11T09:07:00.000-08:00

From the snowbound depths of Britain in February comes heart-warming news on two fronts. The first is that New York ticket sales* are at the half-way mark, with seven weeks to go still, suggesting that people will spend money in a recession if absolutely necessary. Gerry, the RTO treasurer, reports that there have been blocks of tickets purchased by people completely unrelated to members of the orchestra which, if true (and it’s always good to seek a second opinion), is quite remarkable. Although the RTO regularly plays to full houses, these are nearly always made up largely (though not exclusively) of friends and family. How encouraging that the audience base is now widening to encompass ordinary music lovers from all walks of life.
The second fillip for the New York organising committee is the overwhelming success of a medical trial, conducted in secrecy over the course of the past week but now cleared for general release. With so many musicians travelling very close to the concert date there had been concern about jet lag and how it would affect performances. There has been much discussion behind closed doors on this topic. But a solution has been found, thanks to a recommendation by Felicitas Macfie, possibly the RTO’s most frequent flyer (after our chief bassoonist and sousaphonist of course).
Felicitas swears by a homeopathic remedy called No-Jet-Lag** which, rather like the RTO, does what it says on the packet. The committee immediately took Felicitas’s word but in the interests of science, and music, chose to seek a second opinion anyway.
A guinea pig was identified - the RTO’s very own musical director Sir Richard Neville-Towle – and flown to the Caribbean island of St Kitts, which is several hours behind GMT. He was prescribed one No-Jet-Lag pill before take-off and then another one every two hours ‘until the end’. While on St Kitts he was tasked to act quite normally, exactly as if he were on holiday. On the return flight he was to repeat the prescription and on arrival be brought directly from the airport to the home of Felicitas, whereby the committee could inspect him for any side effects. Suffice to say, there were none, at least not in the short term. Sir Richard was suntanned and relaxed, he consumed a portion of Felicitas’s delicious mango mousse with claret jelly, and declared himself one hundred per cent happy with the pills, which had not only cured jet lag but appeared to induce mild euphoria. (The fact that he did not show up for rehearsal later that night was unconnected to the No-Jet-Lag pills.)
As the testimony of Sir Richard and Felicitas is backed up by professional athletes, rugby teams, rock bands and businessmen, the decision was taken by the committee to import a dose for every RTO player embarking on the US tour. The chewable pills contain leopard’s bane, daisy, and clubmoss, do not react with other medication (RTOers with neurotic conditions take note) and come with clear instructions. They really are happy pills. But it is their claim to transport travellers painlessly through multiple time zones that ignites the most excitement in the RTO. Imagine the potential, musically speaking, of a medicine that conquers changes in time, or tempo as we prefer to call it.

*Don’t miss the RTO’s US debut, at the New York Town Hall, April 1, 2009!
**This is not an advertisement.

Terrible but real

2009-01-31T11:59:00.000-08:00

The revelation that Itzhak Perlman, Yo-Yo Ma* and other world acclaimed musicians were not actually playing the music that was heard during an outdoors concert for President Obama raised a few eyebrows in RTO circles. Although these first class performers (Perlman and Ma, not members of the RTO) had a perfectly reasonable explanation – the sub zero temperatures in Washington that day would have damaged their extremely delicate and precious ‘primary’** instruments – some in Edinburgh felt a little smug. For while the Scottish orchestra cannot claim to be in the same league musically as Perlman and co, they have never – repeat never – pre-recorded a performance and then mimed on the night. Certain elements of certain sections (not mentioning any names!) do mime certain passages of music within the context of a live concert. This is completely different from what Perlman and Ma did.
On the subject of violas, one of the RTO’s longest serving players, trombonist Quinton Stewart, has decided to retire and there is therefore a rare vacancy in the brass section. What might this have to do with violas? Well, it was agreed during the last RTO rehearsal that if a suitable replacement for Quinton is not found quickly, an existing RTO musician will be put forward for re-training. And the fairly unanimous decision was that it should be a viola, for two reasons: 1) there are no medics in the viola section and it was felt that brass should now open its ranks to those outside the medical profession, and 2) the trombone offers an RTO violist a fresh challenge with a new approach and this may be all it takes to release any musical potential so far inhibited by the current instrument. At the next RTO rehearsal, there will be a lucky dip among the violas, the winner of which will move immediately to brass, unless a last minute application is received from elsewhere.
Other recent changes to the orchestra’s make-up include the introduction of guest percussionist Gary, filling in temporarily for Neil Smith on drums. The RTO was very fortunate to secure the services of Gary as a drummer, particularly as he is a professional dancer and the RTO doesn’t attract many professional artistes.
And so to New York, where ticket sales for April 1 are nudging towards the 700 mark. This is extremely encouraging, as is the news that another really terrible ensemble is germinating in North America, accidentally inspired by a clip of the RTO spotted on YouTube. David from Inuvik, above the Arctic Circle in the western part of Canada, has emailed to say: ‘We are a small community band that is just starting up with a number of people learning new instruments…Inuvik is about 3000 people and it’s presently -36C here.’
That is cold! The RTO sends the Inuvik Really Terrible Band its warmest wishes and suggests secondary instruments only (indoors and out).

* Yo-Yo Ma is the brother of Dr Yeou-Cheng Ma who runs the Children’s Orchestra Society of New York, a charity supported by the RTO.
** RTO players who have both primary and secondary instruments are advised to bring the latter to New York, just in case the orchestra receives any impromptu requests to perform outside.

RTObama! Purpose over discord!

2009-01-21T13:27:00.000-08:00

As the world watched President Barack Obama’s historic inauguration and listened, hushed, as he ushered in a new era of responsibility, a tingle went down many spines, not least here in Edinburgh, home of the RTO. Though it might seem strange that the best ever President would have anything to say to the worst ever orchestra, there were moments when he spoke directly to the musically disadvantaged of Scotland’s capital, no doubt about it. Who else could President Obama have been referring to when he declared: ‘The challenges are real. They are serious and many. But know this America – they will be met.’
These exact words – or something uncannily similar – have been drummed into the musicians of the RTO week after week, as they embark on their first US tour. The Chairman may lack the basso profundo of the 44th President, he may not pull quite the same crowds, but in full flow he, too, can reduce grown men and women to tears.
The challenges facing the RTO are indeed real, serious and many but they will be met. The feeling here is that America already knows this, as evidenced in advance ticket sales for the New York debut concert on April 1st. At the last count, a staggering 600 seats had been sold which, with 70 days still to go, is a sure sign that Americans have chosen purpose over discord (‘harsh confused mingling of sounds’), and hope over fear (or should that be reason?)
Further proof that hope springs eternal lies in the formation of the Really Terrible Orchestra of Westchester, the third Stateside band to spring up in the RTO’s wake and be welcomed into the League of Terrible Orchestras (LOTOs). To mark the post-inauguration rekindling of the special relationship between ordinary Britons and Americans, the RTO Chairman wishes it to be known that the RTO is willing to share best practice (for those that do) with the LOTOs.
In particular, he is keen to highlight the self-promotion scheme, so far peculiar to the RTO, which has done much to improve mobility, especially from the second violins to the firsts (see player biogs), and promote access.
There is also a tandem self-selection scheme whereby people can ‘select’ themselves for different sections of the orchestra, which helps explain the presence of clarinettists among the violins, cellists with chin rests, and so on. There is a little used de-selection scheme, too, which only Sir Richard, the musical director, can invoke: players exhibiting undue skill on one instrument can be asked to transfer to another, preferably from a different family - viola to tuba, for instance, though de-selection has certainly never been required in RTO violas!

For all the latest RTO news in the countdown to April 1 watch this space!

New Year, New York!

2009-01-10T09:29:00.000-08:00

In this, the year of the RTO’s American debut, players have embarked on a rigorous rehearsal schedule in preparation for the big day (April 1!). We meet next week, for the first time since December 6, in what promises to be a lively session, especially if the musical director feels able to make an announcement regarding the New York programme.
Pippa Lockhart, first trumpet and musical secretary, will be filling in for the Chairman of the New York Committee, Zandra Macpherson (who is exploring future concert opportunities in New Zealand), and hopefully providing an update on ticket sales. All eyes and ears of the orchestra will be on you, Pippa!
The work of the committee has continued over the holiday period – in fact, has intensified – with a number of notable changes in strategy worth mentioning. Most significant is the rearrangement of committee meetings from Tuesday afternoons at Zandra’s to Monday afternoons at Pippa’s. This suits Pippa, though not necessarily all the other committee members. It has been suggested that shifting the meetings to St George’s School for Girls on Wednesday nights, half an hour before RTO rehearsals begin, would not only be more convenient for some of us but would also save on emissions, very much an RTO objective. But as several committee members cannot make the earlier time of 7pm, a practical solution has been put forward by Sir Richard, the musical director. Rather than having the meetings before the rehearsal, it might be more productive, said Sir Richard, to have them during the rehearsal (while sight reading, say, or playing scales) and this way add to the skill sets of everyone present. This is something that will be discussed, no doubt, on Wednesday.
Another slight change in plan concerns the hiring of instruments in New York. The committee’s director of instrument hire, Susie Stevenson (the RTO Chairman’s wife), believes she has found an excellent musical instruments store in New York but advises that because of the great demand for instruments in that city, some RTO musicians may not get exactly the instrument they have requested. For example, while there are plenty of double basses, there may not be enough horns to go round on the day. Violins, too, are obviously very popular and likely to run out. Of course, this is a worst case scenario and possibly everyone will get their first choice of instrument, but Susie just says we should be prepared to be flexible on this matter and take what we get.
There now follows a statement from the Chairman, Peter Stevenson: ‘A happy New Year to family, friends and fans of the RTO, without whom New York would not be possible. And a very big thank you to the committee, whose tireless efforts will go unrewarded.’

* For those who still haven’t bought their tickets for the RTO’s New York Town Hall appearance don’t delay – there are only 80 shopping days left!
* For all the latest RTO news in the countdown to April 1 watch this space!

2008-12-24T05:23:00.000-08:00

STOP PRESS

Ticket sales for the RTO's New York concert have passed the 450 mark - with 97 shopping days still to go before the April 1 curtain up! That leaves just 1050 seats to sell, which means we look like heading towards a full house (in keeping with RTO custom). The Chairman, whose blood pressure drops by the day, welcomed the latest figures but refused to let them go to his head. 'We have much work to do, not least in the preparation of our musicians for this auspicious occasion. I would urge all players to practise over the festive period unless, of course, they are guests in someone else's home or have people staying with them.'
The success of the RTO in conquering the American market* continues to inspire tribute bands, and it was felt that some kind of umbrella organisation should be set up - a sort of international network of musical nonentities.
To this end, the Chairman has already devoted much time and now is delighted to announce the formation of a League of Terrible Orchestras (LOTO), the inaugural meeting of which will be held on March 31st in New York**.
The possibilities for cultural exchanges, individual and whole section swaps, sharing of best practice (for those who do), and perhaps even an open season on visiting soloists, are infinite. 'These are exciting times indeed,' said the RTO's Chairman. 'With the combination of our extraordinary talents, imagine the contribution we could make to the world of classical music.'
Merry Christmas!

* To be confirmed
**To be confirmed

The Triumph of (Sir) Richard

2008-12-18T04:31:00.001-08:00

Christmas Oratorio - Ludus Baroque Chamber Orchestra, Soloists and Chorus directed by Richard Neville Towle at Canongate Kirk, Edinburgh 16 December 2008

Every now and again as a reward for good behaviour our esteemed conductor, Sir Richard, is let out on day release for work experience with real professionals. His presentation of J S Bach’s Christmas Oratorio is becoming a ‘don’t miss’ event on the Edinburgh social calendar and unofficially marks the start of the festive season. This performance of parts 1 - 6 - with a suitably lengthy interval so large amounts of wine and food can be quaffed - was once again a triumph. New tenor on the block Ed Lyon which his creme caramel voice was an enlightened evangelist, Michael Chance’s sublime countertenor lines floated above the orchestra whilst the duets between soprano Sopie Daneman and bass Giles Underwood were just one of many highlights.

Sir Richard was in ebullient form, clearly relishing the eye contact from the members of the orchestra - something that never happens with the RTO - and thrilled that they not only played the right music in tune, but also came in on the beat. The valveless trumpets - or valueless as a misspelling in one review claims - were a lesson to our own trumpet section in how to razzle and dazzle, although sadly none of said section were to be spotted in the audience.

However, other members were out in full force. Chairman and really terrible clarinetist Peter Stevenson shook his head at the interval declaring he’d now heard the Christmas Oratorio four times and that alas he still ‘didn’t get it.’ Hugh Hillyard-Parker threw aside his oboe to open his lungs as a member of the chorus who sang lustily and were generally declared to be the best chorus yet. Our resident German, Felicitas Macfie was perplexed by the translation which she said completely failed to transmit the sheer joy of the original - a text she knows well, reciting it, as one does, before every Christmas meal. Speaking of which, this was truly a feast for the ears, not something one should expect in New York, although potential audience members will be relieved to note the RTO will not be singing - that we leave to the audience, so sharpen up your vocal chords now!

- Miss Chardonnay

RTO gift ideas

2008-12-18T04:28:00.000-08:00

Gift ideas

It's not too late to give your loved ones a Really Terrible Christmas Present...but be quick! There are still a few tickets left (about 1,100 at the last count*) to the RTO's historic New York concert next spring. What better way to convey your true feelings to family and friends in the festive period than by buying them a seat - or a row (go on, why not?) - for the NY Town Hall event? Imagine the looks on their faces! If you're really generous you could pop in the flights, too - but we'll leave that up to you. Remember, this is the last Christmas before the big night - April 1, 2009 - and therefore your last chance to take up this extraordinary offer. There will be a prize for the person who gives the most Really Terrible Christmas Presents (but there will be no refunds for recipients of more than one RTCP).
This scheme not only solves the problem of gift sourcing, it is also environmentally sound. There are no air miles involved in the purchase of an RTCP (though these will be incurred at a later stage, of course), no unnecessary packaging and very little emissions.
RTO chairman Peter Stevenson, announcing the deal, said: 'A Really Terrible Present is not just for Christmas, it is for life. We promise you will be disappointed.'
For advice on how to buy, see the RTO New York flyer on this website.

* More than 400 tickets have already been sold - with 103 days to go! Check this site for the latest update on Christmas Eve.

The RTO Christmas Party

2008-12-15T07:47:00.000-08:00

Although not strictly a sell-out (since there were no tickets to sell) we had a bumper crowd for this least formal of RTO events on December 6th. The musical director decided to restrict the orchestra to a modest programme, including Entry of the Gladiators by Julius Fucik, Prokoviev’s Troika and not much else, thus throwing the floor open to individual and small group efforts. Our founder, Alexander McCall Smith, didn’t quite steal the show with his brass ensemble, but his sousaphone got a big hand, especially from those helping to release the famous author from the instrument later on.

One of the highlights was undoubtedly the oboe section’s rendition of a well known but difficult to identify tune - look out for this talented lot next April! Also stunning was German violinist Felicitas Macfie who treated the hushed auditorium to a Schubert piano duet with game RTO accompanist Margaret Anderson. There was relief all round when mother of six Felicitas announced she would be returning to her first love in New York – and her violin!

It was generally agreed that the controversial introduction of a klaxon bell to cut short the truly cacophonous had been a huge success on the night and saved many from further embarrassment (see ‘string trio 2007’ in player biogs).

The RTO’s final concert before the world tour will be a dress rehearsal on March 25th at our Edinburgh home, St George’s School for Girls. All welcome.

New York Update

2008-12-15T07:35:00.000-08:00

More than 350 tickets have already been sold for our New York debut in April – which leaves just 1150 to go for a full house! This might seem a daunting prospect to some orchestras but not the RTO, which has a remarkable record in selling out its concerts (see ‘Christmas party’ below). Word is spreading fast in musical circles and, with three months and two weeks before the April 1st kick-off, the chair of the joint committee of organisers of the RTO world tour is confident the surge for seats will continue. ‘We have had enquiries from as far away as California and Christchurch,’ said Zandra Macpherson. ‘I have every reason to be relaxed.’*

Watch this space for future updates.

*RTO Chairman Peter Stevenson would like to point out that he is not relaxed and urges far flung friends of the orchestra who are planning to attend the NY Town Hall concert but have not yet purchased their tickets to do so as promptly as possible, both to avoid disappointment and to make his festive season less anxious.